The Nail Olympics Is A Real Thing

This week in Rome, nail artists from all over the world are competing in the 12th annual Nailympics. That’s right, the NAIL OLYMPICS. I know what you’re thinking, and I’m right there with you: not only is there such a thing as Nail Olympics, but there have been ELEVEN of them already?

Still, the results are ridiculously impressive and definitely worth a look. Not too closely, though. Someone might lose an eye! Some of these manicures look like they could double as medieval torture devices. Pretty ones, sure, but still.

The Nail Olympics Brings Extreme Nail Art to Rome

The 2013 Nailympics took place in Rome, Italy, with approximately 220 nail artists competing from around the world. The international competition originally started in Las Vegas in 2001, which means people have been battling for nail-art glory for more than a decade. Meanwhile, I still can’t paint my fingernails without getting half the polish on my actual fingers.

Competitors faced off in seven different specialties, including the appropriately terrifying stiletto nail category. Those are the long, sharply pointed nails that look like they could open a can of soup. Or possibly fight off an intruder. Who needs pepper spray when you’ve got ten tiny daggers attached to your hands?

How Do You Judge an Olympic-Level Manicure?

A panel of eight international judges evaluated the competition. And they weren’t just deciding which nails looked the prettiest. Oh no. This was SERIOUS nail business.

Nail competitions can be judged on all kinds of tiny details, including the structure and shape of the nail, application of products, surface smoothness, and even the model’s cuticles. CUTICLES! Damn, that’s tough. I’m pretty sure the last time I paid attention to my cuticles was never.

And then there’s the actual artwork. We’re talking elaborate designs, sculpted decorations, and miniature creations that make an ordinary coat of nail polish look downright embarrassing. These people aren’t just giving manicures. They’re building tiny art galleries on the ends of their fingers.

Beautiful Nails, Completely Impractical Hands

Of course, not every competition manicure is designed for everyday life. Some are elaborate showpieces meant to demonstrate an artist’s skill rather than help somebody get through a normal Tuesday.

Which is a good thing, because I can’t imagine trying to button a shirt, send a text, or pick up a quarter while wearing these things. I’d probably get my hands stuck in my pockets and have to call the fire department. Again.

But you’ve gotta respect the talent. These artists have the patience, precision, and creativity to turn something as ordinary as a fingernail into a miniature masterpiece. Meanwhile, my greatest accomplishment this week was opening a bag of chips without spilling any.

Still, you know what’s even tougher than winning the Nail Olympics? Figuring out how these people go to the bathroom, amirite? C’mon, you know imrite!