Do Not Like: Lifelike Baby Masks

Artist Landon Meier of Hyperflesh brings us these lifelike baby masks. There are three expressions to choose from: Disgusted Baby, Happy Baby, and Cry Baby. Somehow, even the happy one sounds like a warning. These are oversized baby faces worn as masks, and the combination of infant features and an adult body is doing absolutely nothing for my peace of mind.

It’s like these things went to the All U Can Creep buffet and went back for seconds. And used the same plate. Rude! I take my buffeting very seriously. But we’ll get back to that after we address the enormous baby face in the room.

Three Baby Faces, Three Different Problems

Coverage published in April 2013 identified the designs as Disgusted Baby, Happy Baby, and Cry Baby. Each takes an ordinary infant expression and turns it into a full costume centerpiece. The expression stays put while the person wearing it moves around, which is a pretty effective recipe for making an otherwise ordinary situation feel deeply strange.

A crying baby is familiar. A grown person with an enormous, permanently crying baby face is something my brain would like a minute to process. Happy Baby doesn’t get a free pass, either. That fixed expression could make buying groceries feel like a scene that happens just before the lights go out in a horror movie.

The Artist Behind Hyperflesh

Meier’s work extends beyond the baby faces. A 2017 profile of his mask-making practice covered Hyperflesh designs depicting celebrities and public figures, alongside the crying baby. The broader collection shows his interest in turning recognizable faces into wearable objects, with results that can be impressive and unsettling at the same time.

That’s the annoying thing about being creeped out by good craftsmanship: you still have to acknowledge the craftsmanship. I can appreciate the work involved while also requesting that the finished object remain several rooms away from me. Preferably behind a door. A door someone has thoughtfully labeled.

A Historical Novelty, Not a Current $350 Offer

The original feature quoted $350 for a mask, a figure also reported by other publications in 2013. That establishes the historical price, rather than what a buyer would pay today. Current availability and pricing for these exact designs haven’t been confirmed, so the old figure shouldn’t be treated as a live shopping offer.

As a costume idea, the premise certainly sticks with you. You don’t need an elaborate outfit when the face has already taken over the conversation. Me? I’m returning to the buffet, where the only expression I want to see is mild concern about whether I can finish another plate. I’m gonna get my money’s worth. The giant baby can find its own table.