Get Paid To Advertise On Your Beard

Do you have a big, bad-ass burly beard and are desperately searching for a way to monetize it? Maybe you should spend your time doing something more productive? Like, look for a real job? Orrrrrrr become a Beardvertiser!

Back in 2013, A&W was involved in a campaign offering bearded men up to $5 a day to wear a BeardBoard, a mini billboard that clips onto your beard. That’s right, somebody finally figured out how to turn facial hair into prime advertising real estate. FINALLY! Your beard can start pulling its own weight around here.

Hey, why not pay us ladies to rock ads in our hair? I got a sidepony just begging to market your product! You want pigtails? I’ll do pigtails. But those’ll be extra.

Beardvertising Turns Facial Hair Into Advertising Space

The bizarre Beardvertising concept came from Kentucky advertising agency Cornett-IMS, which launched the idea in May 2013. The premise was ridiculously simple: grow an impressive beard, clip a miniature advertisement into your facial hair, and potentially collect up to $5 a day for walking around looking like a human billboard.

A&W Restaurants was one of the brands involved in the original promotion, which encouraged men with particularly magnificent facial hair to sign up. Because apparently a regular billboard just wasn’t hairy enough. You know what they say: location, location, location. And there’s no better location than directly underneath a man’s nose!

The miniature signs were called BeardBoards, and the whole operation was marketed as a way to transform your beard into a business. Imagine explaining that income source on your taxes. Occupation: PROFESSIONAL BEARD. Job responsibilities: growing hair, walking around, occasionally scratching chin.

Was Beardvertising Actually Real?

Well, yes and no. The original Beardvertising campaign started as a publicity stunt rather than a fully established network of paid facial-hair advertisers. The agency wanted to get people talking, and boy, did it work. Turns out offering money to dudes with giant beards is a pretty effective way to get the internet’s attention.

But here’s where things get interesting: the joke eventually became a real advertising campaign. In July 2013, Dollar Shave Club partnered with Beardvertising for a four-day promotion featuring 25 men who wore miniature advertisements in their beards and documented the experience on social media.

So somebody actually took this ridiculous idea and made it happen. Which gives me renewed hope for my proposed sideponytail advertising empire. SOMEONE CALL THE INVESTORS!

Of course, the original $5-a-day pitch was part of a historical marketing campaign, not a standing job offer. So don’t go growing a beard expecting a paycheck to magically appear. Although if you do manage to make a living selling advertising space on your face, I expect a commission for emotional support.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to find some sponsors for my pigtails. Left side gets the premium ad placement. Right side costs extra if you want me to swing it around dramatically. That’s called MARKETING, people!