This is the Portuguese man o’ war. It’s a Siphonophore, which means it’s not just one creepy-ass sea creature, it’s like a billionty creepy-ass sea creatures called zooids that make up the entire organism. Little zooid duders have to stick together because they can’t survive on their own. Basically a co-dependent relationship like me and my cats. We need each other! Some might say that’s unhealthy, but I say mind your damn business. Don’t let its innocent, condom-y appearance fool you — the Portuguese man o’ war is super venomous. Despite its looks, it’s basically the worst replacement for a contraceptive. Unless you plan on the thing just burning your wiener clean off, in which case, sure. I mean, totally weird and unnecessary, but sure: that’ll work.
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