YES: Duck Fashion Show
Story by:
Brittany High
Duck fashion shows. They exist. At Sydney’s Royal Easter Show, the Pied Piper Duck Show gave dressed-up ducks their moment on the runway. I know what you’re thinking, and YES, dreams really do come true.
The Pied Piper Duck Fashion Show in Sydney
The show was associated with Australian farmer Brian Harrington, whose feathered performers had a wardrobe considerably more ambitious than mine. Reporting described outfits styled for different themes and eras, with everything from daywear to evening looks and bridal attire. Because apparently one outfit per duck would be ridiculous.
Handmade Outfits for the Best-Dressed Ducks
And these weren’t just whatever scraps happened to be lying around. In October 2012, ABC Rural reported that the ducks had worn hundreds of outfits, handmade by a dressmaker in Deniliquin. That is a lot of tiny wardrobe decisions. Somewhere, a duck had a better-dressed week than I did.
Later coverage of the Sydney show described colorful gowns and matching little hats. The appeal is pretty straightforward: take the seriousness of a fashion runway, replace the models with waddling waterfowl, and try to keep a straight face. Good luck with that.
Even the Duck Models Had Security
ABC also reported that a sheepdog kept watch over the performers. So yes, the ducks had handmade outfits and their own security detail. Fashion is a serious business.
Why Duck Fashion Shows Are Pure Happiness
You know that empty feeling you just can’t escape, no matter how hard you try to fill the void with candy, beer, nachos, and pizza? No? Just me? Well, duck fashion shows are exactly what I’ve needed all my life.
For once, I feel whole. And I’ll tell you this: it was well worth the years of lonely nights, crying into the mirror screaming “WHY, WHY?!” Wait.
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