The Dick Tie is exactly what it sounds like, provided it sounds like a tie shaped like a penis. NOT a tie for your penis as I originally thought. Penises need ties too! Not true, me. Currently The Dick Tie is in the fundraising stage — you can donate to the wienerworthy cause over at the Kickstarter campaign. Contribute just $30 you too can own a 100% silk pink, black, or patterned penis-shaped tie. That’s right: dreams really do come true! Now go forth and live your penis-shaped tie dreams. You deserve it, you little weirdo!


Check it out


  1. Mike Jackson

    Nice. Love how this is a storefront masquerading as a Kickstarter campaign. They should have just gone on to Etsy and sold them on there. It also would have been better if they’d made the ties themselves or gotten someone around them to do it rather than outsource the work. It’s kind of the antithesis of everything that a Kickstarter is supposed to be.

  2. The Dick Tie

    Hi Mike,

    Thanks for your feedback! We want to clarify- we aren’t arbitrarily making these ties in Abu Dhabi because it’s outsourced/cheaper. We actually have a member of our team who has been going to school there for four years. There are tailors in Abu Dhabi that are willing to try this sort of thing out, and so our member has been meeting with them individually to work on design and quality assurance. This isn’t some shady, over-the-phone, mass production kind of business. Though we understand that some people will be turned off by the fact that we aren’t producing these ties all-American, we hope that the majority of people understand that producing the ties in this way (for right now, as we get ourselves grounded as a business) was not to save money or to screw workers out of money (our tailors name their own price for their work), but because of the difficulty in acquiring the materials and partners necessary to bring our designs to life within the US. The reason we feel that this is more than a storefront is that we are still in the early, early stages in development as a company, and this Kickstarter will determine whether or not we can continue with our fun, crazy, controversial idea. We have a lot of other fun plans of where this can go, but we have to take baby steps, and this Kickstarter is one of them.

    That said, we totally respect you not wanting to back our project, as there are hundreds of other awesome projects on Kickstarter that may appeal to you more than The Dicktie. We hope that this helps you understand some of our decisions regarding the project!


  3. Paddy Kelly

    The longer the excuse, the less it actually means.

  4. Winterbabie

    Design and quality assurance?? ::AHAHHAA.. it’s fucking piece of material cut to look like a dick! I’m not rocket scientist::a d’oh, but anyone could do this. What’s next, uncircumcised dick ties, where you can use the extra material to wipe your ass?? LOL!! Pssst.. if you ever wanna make one true to likeness, use a bowtie.. that’s about the right size of majority of them.

  5. DCgal62

    No, but I know a lot of men who should wear them as a warning. D*ck approaching.

  6. John Dugan

    Well-dressed or well-hung? Either way, keep the real one healthy. Using a superior penis health crème (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) can help with odor, dry/flaky skin, loss of sensation, etc.

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