The Potty Putter is for the avid golfer who can’t put his clubs down long enough to drop the kids off at the pool. God I’m disgusting. The toilet mini-golf kit includes a putting green that fits around your commode, 2 golf balls (just in case you hit one into a water hazard), a putter, flag stick, and “Do Not Disturb” sign. You know, so no one bothers you while you’re putting on the pot. But who’s gonna slow clap for you when you make a hole in one? Exactly — the same person who’s gonna run out of the bathroom saying “What the f*** did you eat? You nasty!”

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