These are Melting Tights by URB Clothing. They make it look like your legs are melting. Or that you’re leaking some paint from your drawls. Either way, lose-lose. Jk jk, they’re really cool. NO, wait. They’re hot. So hot, in fact, they’re melting. If you want a pair of your own, you can get them over at the URB website for about $50, plus shipping. I know what you’re thinking and I agree — $50 for a pair of tights is pretty pricey. Are they at least run-proof? Like, are they resistant to snagging and tearing? Also, as in, will they prevent me from ever having to move faster than a leisurely stroll? Because that would be a definite plus.

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