If you’ve seen that ooky movie called The Human Centipede you might like this crochet scarf modeled after the concept. Made by etsy seller knottyfingers, 100 bones gets you one made-to-order in any color you’d like. I don’t know about this, guys. I mean, I can’t say for certain what the movie is about, because my mom doesn’t let me watch anything rated R (nightmares). But a kid at the playground told me it’s about *whispers* eating doo-doo. Then he was like, “By the way, lady, why the hell do you hang out here? You’re a f***ing grown up!” and I was all “Whoa whoa whoa — watch the language! A playground shouldn’t be limited to just children. Besides, the bar doesn’t even open till 4 PM. What the heck am I supposed to do with my time until then, huh? Exactly, now where was I? Oh yeah — BIG SLIDE, I GET DIBS ON THE BIG SLIDE!”

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