Gah! Trim your damn neck-hair, bro. We’re trying to sell a product over here. During the winter season, I guess you could keep your ears warm by wearing something dumb like ear muffs or a beanie. But really, that’s only if you wanna look like a total doofus. Pshhh, I’d rather risk getting freezer burn! Enter Hipstörmössan Ear Caps, two teeny Barbie-sized beanies that fit snugly over your ears. Where have these been all my life? Just in case your eye balls aren’t working right (when are they ever?!), these little caps are fancier than Mr. Peanut and the Monopoly guy combined. Plus functional. Just like a Snuggie. It’s a shame these aren’t for sale anywhere… trust me, I searched exhaustively and found nothing started to Google it, but gave up before I even finished typing Hipstörmö


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