This is a custom, made to order Mario Piranha Plant Pyrex Glass Pipe made by Hedcraft. It’s perfectly combines and represents the two things I love to do most: get high and play video games. It does NOT include my third favorite thing which is eat junk food like it’s my j-o-b. That is represented through my Cheeto-dusted fingertips. I didn’t choose this life, this life chose me! No word on whether the Piranha Plant Pipe improves your game-playing abilities. My guess is that it doesn’t. But I’ll bet you an entire pizza that it’s gonna improve my ability to kill an entire pizza in one sitting.

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