These are Witch Fingers, designer grapes that are long and creepy like Witches Fingers. This bunch was spotted and subsequently bought by Redditor pocketmole. Good choice! I would’ve just picked them up, squeezed one until it exploded, said “Weird!”, put them back, and headed directly to the junk food aisle. And to think I would’ve missed out on trying something new! I wonder how much other stuff I’ve overlooked because I only got Cheetos on the brain. You’re right, probably a lot. I didn’t choose this life, Cheetos chose me!

Edit: I previously reported that Witches Fingers taste like cotton candy. They don’t — they taste like regular grapes. Below is the photo of cotton candy flavored grapes. WTF, grapes?! Y u gotta be so crazy?