Everyone and their gramma loves Lionel Richie. That’s the only conclusion I can come to after the success of the Hello? Is It Tea You’re Looking For? teapot we featured a while back. You people love that mustachioed crooner! Don’t get me wrong, I do too. But I know he’d never go for someone like me so I pretend that I don’t. It’s like a defense mechanism and I’m working on it with my therapist. Anyway, now you can get this spoon rest featuring Lionel’s flawless visage quietly beseeching ‘Hello? Is It Me You’re Cooking For?’ With all due respect, Mr. Richie, I think it’s pretty presumptious of you to assume that I’m cooking for you. A, You never return my calls. B, I’m currently making a single packet of Ramen noodles. Everyone knows that’s barely enough for one human, it certainly isn’t going to feed two. Soon I will be eating it straight from the pot and over the sink so I don’t make a mess. Because I am alone. Oh god, I’m so alone! BRB calling my therapist.
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