We’ve seen all kinds of toasters here at IT. We’ve seen toasters that toast weather on your toast, toast hot dogs and buns, or even toast Jesus’ face on your toast to name a few. But we’ve never in our wildest dreams (and we have some pretty wild dreams btw) heard of one the worships Satan. Enter the possessed toaster, covered by The Today Show back in 1984. You could say it’s old news or you could say it’s new old news or you could say OMG, a Satanic toaster? Whaaaaaaa?! In the interview a couple displays their toaster which is clearly possessed. It shoots fire and writes the words “Satan Lives” on the bread. And knowing how the Dark Lord is such an @$$hole, it probably also burns toast to a crisp. I’m just assuming, because he will ruin anything including breakfast. RUDE. Jk jk Satan — please don’t possess any of my kitchen appliances. Especially not my microwave. We’ve got a special sort of relationship. Me + Microwave = 2getha 4evaaaa!
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