They say that elephants never forget. And no one is gonna forget these Elephant Boxers sold by MySexyShorts either. The company sent me a pair to try out and, wow, you guys. Wow wow wow. I can’t even begin to even rn. You know what I’m saying? Neither do I.
At first glance I was like “Hm, yeah, wow, this is really happening.” On second glance I had to slap my face a couple times and give myself a pep talk in the mirror. “You can do this, Brittany! Everything is fine! This is fine!” On third glance, it wasn’t even a glance at all. I stared that elephant right in the eyes and said “What time is it?” and then I responded “Tool Time!” And then I put them on. What can I say? I have a flair for the dramatic. Plus I used to watch a lot of Home Improvement. JTT, if you’re reading this: call me!
The deets: The pair I received was a Large. It’s got a drawstring, big pink elephant ears hanging off the size that did no favors for my self-image, and a trap door in the back that is held closed by snaps. Let us never speak of this trap door again.
I do not have a penis so, admittedly, they looked a bit off. That said, I’m sure if I were equipped with a penis, they would probably look better. Also, I would have the ability to pee standing up which would be convenient. I showed the shorts to a male friend and asked what he thought of them. He asked if I was okay and when I assured him that I am not, but to please answer the question, he said “I imagine it feels kind of like toe socks.” So take that for what you will.
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